Have you ever had the feeling that you are not at home anywhere? Ever been too tired to care? I must admit over this half term I have definitely had both of those feelings, in abundance.
Why would that be, well I pondered about it for a little while and thought that in over 3 weeks, I had only been in one place for 3 days. I mean that’s crazy. Now some of that was work, some of that self inflicted, but it’s important to spend time with the family and that sometimes means going away. No wonder, I felt so tired and a little jaded.
I’ve decided to stick around Manchester as much as I can, as you really need a base to work from, somewhere that you can most definitely call home.
All of this has been a little complicated by buying a house in rural Wales that I am currently doing up. You may ask the question, why would you want to do that Jon? Now in an attempt to answer that question would not be as straightforward as you many think…. lots of things to do with provision, common sense and always wanting to do it. I always find it helpful to have something to do that is not ministry related at all. Keeps me sane. I mean, the ministry is fine, but you can start to loose touch with the real world and all that.
With all of this activity, I’ve decided that the calling I have is no simple thing. In years gone by, Jude and I have always thought that we would be nomadic, doing the things that the Lord wants us to do in different places. I was thinking about that last night and considered the cost of it all. There’s part of me that quite likes my house, quite likes the ‘middle’ class life and all that. I do think however that life is deceptive, lulling us into a false comfort and a false productivity. As I’m writing this, the apostle Paul comes to mind, who spent most of his life moving around, working into one place at a time, but then was mindful of all the churches and fellowships he had planted. I’m not claiming any parallel there, but I understand that it is hard to do. I guess he felt that he was in too many places and in difficult places most of his life.
It’s all a question of priority and what you live for I guess. For me, it hasn’t been one decision, it’s a whole load of them, one after the other, counting the cost in many ways.
Sometimes. it is very wise to lift your head up to see what all this cost is achieving. You would be right in thinking I find this life hard sometimes by the way, both Jude and I do, we have multiple circles of friends and yet do not feel close to many people at all. It seems sometimes that others have more…. but I know that this life we are choosing, that has been given to us is achieving far more than activity around us, it is bearing fruit that will last forever.
A friend of mine Billy was leading worship at a church in Wales that I was attending last Sunday. There was an old welsh hymn that to be honest I didn’t understand apart from one line (that was translated!) that stated that Jesus is enough. He is enough, final, no explanation needed, HE IS enough. I believe for me that is good enough, He is good enough, for any sacrifice and for any hardship.
Could you decide in your life that Jesus is enough? If no-one on earth was to give you anything in return for the service you render to him, would HE be enough? I struggle, hope and pray that I am counted among those, where he was enough. That’s the hope I have, to do what I can in this life for Him, who the Bible says first loved me.
When I’m in too many places, I need to remember this. How about you, what does this say to you? Leave a comment and let me know….